As a Child Enters the World
As I enter my new family,
May they be delighted
at how their kindness
Comes into blossom.
Unknown to me and them,
May I be exactly the one
To restore in their forlorn places
New vitality and promise.
May the hearts of others
Hear again the music
In the last echoes
Of their neglected wonder.
….May my eyes never lose sight
Of why I have come here,
That I never be claimed
By the falsity of fear
Or eat the bread of bitterness.
In everything I do, think,
Feel, and say,
May I allow the light
Of the world I am leaving
To shine through and carry me home.
— By John O’Donahue, To Bless the Space Between Us: A Book of Blessings
During my layover in Denver, I got a text from my childhood bestfriend Tina Yates. It read, “Walter Andrew, born June 20, 6 pounds, 12 ounces.”
I think I jumped a little, right in my chair, with startled delight. It was so indescribably sweet to hear the name Walter again, to know that Walter has made a fresh entrance into this world.
Tina’s father, Walter, was also my dad’s childhood bestfriend. My dad and he remained close during Walter’s devestating descent into Alzheimer’s. My dad even took him to Loudes, France in the hopes of a miraculous healing, and Walter wandered off and was nearly lost in the Great Pyranees Mountains. He was gone for 48 hours, and to this day none of us knows where he was, or how he remained safe and dry despite the pouring rain and his inability to speak French even when his mind was sharp.
And Tina and I, for our part, have also remained close. We don’t talk all that frequently, but the synchronicity of our lives never ceases to amaze me. Tina gave birth to her first child, Sage, eight years ago, just as I was preparing to fly out of Minneapolis. Sage was born exactly (to the day!) three months after my firstborn, Anna, just as Tina was born exactly three months after me.
For his part, Walter Andrew was born just as I was preparing to depart for Minneapolis. When I got the text in Denver, I was delighted to reply, “I’m coming! I’ve got a lei for you!” As if I’d never left, is if I could just pop by the hospital in the same way I used to dash up the road to her house as I did so many hundreds of times when we were children.
About Tina’s father: this photo captures his gentleness and how much he adored Tina. He is holding the newborn Tina who had a shock of black hair just like the newborn baby Walter.
When Walter was diagnosed with Azheimer’s it was devestating for all who loved him. But I will never forget the way that his family cared for him at home, with such love and tenderness.
Tina was in her twenties. She was in that age gap when most people are self-focused, trying to figure out where they fit in the world. Tina was a working mom, newly-married, extremely busy. But carved out time to care for her father. If you ask her about how she did this, she would tell you that her dad was her world, and with all he had given her, how could she not give something back?
And now from that place of eternal memory her father is somehow present again: a grandson, named Walter Andew, named for the fathers of both his parents, due July 9th, but coming just in time, on Father’s Day.
